Let Steve Harvey host Jeopardy!

The Root

"Harvey, as you might already know, is currently the host of 739 different shows, including Family Feud, Celebrity Family Feud, The Miss Universe Pageant, Fox’s New Year’s Eve Special, NFL Honors, Steve, Steve on Watch, Judge Steve Harvey (seriously), Steve’s Sleeves (a show about his suits), and Steves Without Sleeves (a show about amputee n*ggas named Steve)," says Damon Young. "Although his brand of cheeky homespun aphorism ages like milk in heat in large doses, it’s perfect for the dynamic of hosting things, which requires an innate grasp of when to be hotel wallpaper, and when to be the minibar. Now, to say that Steve Harvey would be a counterintuitive choice is like saying whiskey is a counterintuitive alternative to water. Jeopardy!’s entire brand is the performance of the cerebral—its contestants are the type of niggas confident enough in their intellectual capacity to test it in front of millions, and the viewers are either testing themselves against the standard of the contestants or actively competing against them. There’s a significant difference between booksmart and bookish. But with the typical Jeopardy! contestant, there is none. Introducing Harvey’s aggressively Cleveland affect to this would be jarring as f*ck. Which is exactly why I believe it would work. Imagine the nuclear chaotic energy of witnessing Steve malaprop his way through those categories. Picture the juxtaposition of the tweeds and corduroys of the contestants with his iridescent cabaret ‘fits. Imagine his enunciation. His faces. His teeth. Plus, he already has the Trebekian quality of being enough of a d*ck to roast the nerds, but not so much of a d*ck that they don’t laugh with him. And old people already looooooooooove him, so you know they’d be down for host Steve."