Shake Chatterjee's Love Is Blind controversy reveals a self-hatred of his own culture

Decider

It was jarring to see Chatterjee talking about how he doesn’t find Deepti Vempati attractive on the reunion special after gushing over how attractive he finds her during Season 2, says Radhika Menon. "As hosts Nick and Vanessa Lachey noted in the reunion, Shake’s inability to let go of the attraction variable and give himself over to the process made him feel like he was in the wrong show entirely," says Menon. "The thing is, I don’t entirely disagree with Shake. I believe every relationship requires a component of physical attraction, and anything that doesn’t is just a glorified friendship. But it’s the way in which he goes about it that is especially nasty, desexualizing Deepti constantly by comparing her to his aunt. He claims to be referencing the familiarity that he feels with Deepti, but what he’s covering up is the internalized racism he holds against Indian women. It’s clear in watching him talk badly about her behind her back that he is not only a jerk, but also possesses a self-hatred toward his culture, seeing as how he can’t see a gorgeous brown woman standing in front of him as anything more than just a family member. Of course, he’s allowed to have his preferences, but it’s clear that his mental block spans beyond just that. Shake isn’t an anomaly. Indian (and specifically, Indian-American) men like him are aplenty: they are, generally speaking, fatphobic, hyper-obsessed with attractiveness and social status, and tend to favor blonde hair and light skin. I’ve met many of them in real life, men who spend their youthful years chasing white women only to appear later with their tails between their legs with hopes of settling down with an Indian woman who will satisfy their moms." Meanwhile, Vempati tells the Los Angeles Times her Love Is Blind experience has been "so emotional, it’s been a lot. I’m in a glass case of emotion because, on the one hand, I’m so, so happy that it’s done and I can move on and put this chapter to rest. But at the same time, it’s disappointing and sad that I just have no idea who this person (Shake) is anymore. I cared for him. And it just doesn’t seem like that emotion was reciprocated."