"I think for the majority of the episode I felt scared all the time," Brown said of Tuesday's very stressful episode that kicked off a trilogy of installments focusing on each Pearson sibling. "I asked myself the question, what is it like to live with fear just under the surface of not being able to control your environment, or thinking that there is a way to actually control your environment? And then when that illusion is taken away from you, how do you see yourself in relation to the world, right. Every day after shooting I'd just go home and take a bath. I needed to relax because there's tension in my body that I'm looking to release. With Randall over the course of four years there are times in which there's a goofy charm that he gets to enjoy and relax into, and then there's moments of great trauma and grief, and trying to figure out how to keep it all together. This episode is definitely falls into the latter category. In a separate interview with Variety, Brown added that "there’s a deep level of empathy for friends; for family members that I have that live with anxiety, bipolar, schizophrenia, other mental disorders. It must be exhausting to be scared all of the time; it must be exhausting to not feel fully comprehended. And so, during the course of this episode, almost on a nightly basis, I had that feeling of, 'I’m tired.' The running was probably the most energizing part of the episode because I got a chance to just let go."
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TOPICS: Sterling K. Brown, NBC, This Is Us, Isaac Aptaker