Ted Lasso reveals it's been about mental health all along

Vox

"Early in Ted Lasso’s second season, I was discussing a minor revelation from episode two with a fellow critic — a revelation she just didn’t buy," says Emily VanDerWerff. "'I don’t believe Ted wouldn’t like therapy,' she said. 'He seems like he’d be in therapy constantly.' It’s an idea plenty of other critics and fans have raised. Ted — the mustachioed underdog soccer coach for the soul played by Jason Sudeikis — seems like a progressive, modern man who is emotionally mature and pulled together. A few think pieces about the show have even argued that Ted himself functions as a sort of ersatz therapist for a world filled with conflict and torment. How could he possibly not like therapy? Yet as season two has unspooled, Ted Lasso has made a compelling argument for Ted not as a would-be therapist who gives his players a shoulder to cry on, but as someone who lets others unload their emotions to him because he is incapable of doing so. Ted isn’t emotionally mature; he’s emotionally stunted in a way that keeps anybody from ever looking too closely at him. That development comes to a head in the series’ latest episode, 'Man City.' A devastating loss on the soccer pitch for Ted’s team AFC Richmond, followed by the sight of a player’s abusive father “joking” with his son in a nasty way after the game, prompts Ted to finally call Sharon (Sarah Niles), the team’s therapist. Ted admits his darkest secret into the phone....What I love about this story arc is the way Ted Lasso has taken something we know to be true about Ted — he’s very emotionally available to everyone — and flipped our assumptions on their ear. He’s not emotionally available to everyone because he’s done the hard work of healing old wounds; he’s emotionally available to everyone because he doesn’t believe his own needs are as important. Lots of people who suffered horrible things in their childhood and adolescence have developed exactly the same coping mechanism. You don’t look at the thing. You can’t look at the thing. So you help other people instead. That works until it doesn’t."

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• Ted Lasso seems to be aware of the "Black therapist" trope in its use of Dr. Sharon Fieldstone: "Over the last several years, episodic television has been awash in Black therapists," says Amma Marfo. "Shows like You’re the Worst, Never Have I Ever, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, Broad City, Grace and Frankie, In Treatment, and many others have all presented arcs of growth and self-improvement that were helped along by the professional wisdom of Black women. Given the history of onscreen portrayals afforded to them, a newfound abundance of educated Black women on our screens seems like something to be celebrated, but as Aisha Harris correctly pointed out in 2018, what we’re actually seeing is the emergence of a new trope that’s just as likely to overshadow these women’s humanity. 'They’re on screen to do a job, albeit one signifying a wealthier class status, and ostensibly a product of choice rather than forced circumstances,' Harris wrote, noting, ;they exist in these narratives for the sole purpose of listening to the woes of their white patients, not unlike the (Black Best Friend), and helping them arrive at a process for fixing themselves.” Add to that the comparative dearth of Black therapists in the profession (in the U.S., recent estimates hover around 4 percent), and we have a recipe for a new device of white self-realization. Dr. Sharon Fieldstone the character almost certainly isn’t thinking of herself as a trope, and yet her introduction to Ted and the rest of the Diamond Dogs shows glimmers of self-awareness on the show’s part. When she proclaims her competence at her job — evoking memories of the fiery speech Scandal’s Eli Pope gave to his disgraced daughter about needing to be 'twice as good to get half of what they have' — she not only affirms herself in the eyes of white men who have already voiced skepticism about what she has to offer but also highlights the other element of this dynamic that challenges the emerging trope: this Black lady therapist does not have a willing client."
• A real-life therapist explains what Ted Lasso gets right about resistance to therapy: "Therapy is all about sitting with and processing uncomfortable emotions in a safe space," says licensed therapist Erin Qualey. "Unfortunately, much of Ted’s ethos runs completely counter to this idea. His 'be a goldfish' saying and his staunch belief in 'rom-communism' both center on selective amnesia of the negative and overemphasis on the positive. But Ted has another mantra: 'bird by bird.' Originating in the book of the same name by Anne Lamott, the term connotes perseverance and patience: It means to take things one step at a time until a daunting task is completed. So when Ted finally decides to engage in therapy with Dr. Sharon, he’s determined to not give up. And, wouldn’t you know, there’s a bird involved."
• Sarah Niles discusses Dr. Fieldstone's interactions with Ted in this week's episode: "Yeah, it’s more about: Who is he really? Like, what’s going on? One of the things she says is, “Are you good at your job?” And then when he admits that he is, she says, 'I believe you.' I don’t think she says those words lightly. I think she believes that he’s good at his job, but the way he’s presented himself to others may work for them, but it’s not helpful for him. I don’t think it’s helpful for him, or for Sharon, if we just go down that road of Happy-go-lucky, Ted, you know? The idea is for him to be honest and truthful and to make him better. You start to realize that she’s got a few barriers herself."
• Niles on the advice Jason Sudeikis gave her: "One of the things I found really curious on the page was the script described her as 'very kind,' but what she was saying didn’t seem that way," says Niles. "So I was like, how do you angle that? Kindness doesn’t always have to be out-and-out positive on face value. When I spoke to Jason he gave me lots of important pointers, about some books I could read, and he talked about Brené Brown, who’s brilliant, and talks about vulnerability and shame. (Jason’s) a wonderful storyteller. He didn’t tell me all of the journey, but he did point me in some directions: She’s extremely good at her job, she’s kind of like an assassin — she comes in, she does a job, she gets out. That’s how she operates. One of my fears is that she would come across as cold."
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